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Behind the Scenes

We would like to tell you a little more about this site and Better Rest. Here are some frequently asked questions.

Q. Why is your website so dark?

A.  We don’t want to make you look at a bright screen at night! We made the website a dark design to reduce the screen brightness if you are looking at it on a mobile device at night, rather than being one more white screen. If you have difficulty reading the text, please use a reader, or let us know how we can help make it more accessible. (Or get a bookmarklet to change it to white on black from the ‘update’ box on this page).

Q. How much do you charge?

A. There is no charge. We offer a completely free service.

Q. How come you are free?

A.  We have a passion for trying to make the world a better place through helping parents, families and babies, and we truly believe it is possible to find ways to support parents without asking for anything back. While we respect the right for everyone to earn a living, we don’t believe in charging vulnerable sleep deprived parents a high fee.

Sleep consultants usually provide reassurance, encouragement, support, and information about sleep methods. While this is valuable, we can provide a version of these services free of charge.

Q. Won’t I get a better service if I pay a sleep consultant?

A. We believe you can achieve a well rested and happy family without needing to pay. But you can decide for yourself whether you prefer to pay for the reassurance and attention of a sleep consultant. In the end it is up to you!

Q. What can a sleep consultant offer that you don’t?

A. Good question. One thing we are currently unable to offer is individualised phone calls or extended email exchanges. However, we provide links to free family and counselling helplines in our Self Care Resources. You will be able to talk through your concerns with trained staff, without needing to pay. Some helplines may have a charge, but this is low compared to a sleep consultant’s fees. (Not that they do the same thing of course, but just in terms of total expenditure).  In addition, you know your family in a way that a sleep consultant can not.  If, in the end, you feel that a sleep consultant is the best option for you, have a look at The Birthing Space for an example of good practice.

Q. Do you get results?

A. Yes we do. We help you to adapt your expectations and to cope with your situation. You will see results in the improvement of your whole experience of this time. We do not promise unrealistic stretches of sleep in the short term, but you may find your sleep improves and you will feel more rested.  We can also help you to feel better and to enjoy looking after yourself and your family.

Q. So what do you actually offer?

A. We offer a supportive presence, so you know you are not alone. We offer a step by step personalized method, the “Better Rest Method“, for you to follow. We offer stories from other parents, to help you get ideas and inspire you to find your own way. We offer inspiration in your Instagram feed or your Facebook, to help you find ways of coping. We offer information about other sleep methods, practical tips to make your days easier, and ideas and reminders about looking after yourself. We also answer questions about things that may help you get more sleep.  If you need to talk to someone or get practical help, we offer links to charities and phone helplines. We have read through loads of other websites and research articles, to bring you myth busting about baby sleep, and the truth about whether sleep training actually works or is worth it.

Q. You don’t seem to understand. I’m unbearably tired like I have never been before. I can’t function like this, and my whole family is suffering. Telling me to plan my own sleep approach, drink chamomile tea, take naps and get some fresh air just won’t cut it.  Something’s got to give.

A. We understand. We hear you. Please trust us when we say that, however you are feeling right now, we don’t believe that you want the thing that gives to be your sweet baby. Let us help you find other ways of coping for this short time. This chapter is short.

Q. Your approach isn’t working for my family.

A. Thank you for the feedback, that is valuable. Please let us know how else we can help. We wish you all the best in finding your way. We are here for you.

Q. I think I want someone to tell me it’s okay to use a ‘cry it out’ or ‘controlled crying’ method.

A. We understand that, at times, it can feel very tempting to use extinction methods. We truly believe that, deep down, you would prefer not to use these methods. We believe that you may be turning to them in desperation. We can help you get through this short time without using cry it out.

Q. You seem to be anti-cry it out and anti-controlled crying, and that offends me.

A. Okay. We are still here for you.

Q. My doctor told me to use controlled crying.

A. That doesn’t mean you have to do it. Try our method first. Or read here why it may not really be what you want to do. We’re here for you.

Q. There’s something missing from your website and service.

A. Great, thanks for the feedback! Please get in touch and let us know.

Q. Why do you write your email address in longhand like that?

A. To stop the spam bots!

Have a lovely day. We’re here for you.